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Unafraid and boldly
reacting soul-ly
holding gently
fiercely
I want to be one with love unafraid.
reacting soul-ly
holding gently
fiercely
I want to be one with love unafraid.
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theurchiness
collect. regenerate. renew.
16 September 2008 @ 02:02 pm
If this corner were in your house, what would you do with it?
http://www.flickr.com/photos/wakingmagen
(Sorry about the link, Photobucket won't rotate my image and it certainly needs to be seen the right way up! :))
( Restrictions and more info under the cut... )
Thanks in advance!
10 August 2008 @ 11:19 am
"It's hard to stay mad when there's so much beauty in the world.
Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much.
My heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst.
Then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it,
and then it flows through me like rain,
and I can't feel anything but gratitude
for every single moment of my stupid little life."
Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much.
My heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst.
Then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it,
and then it flows through me like rain,
and I can't feel anything but gratitude
for every single moment of my stupid little life."
05 August 2008 @ 10:35 pm
Seeing a little elven friend atop a rotting and moss covered tree trunk
Wanting to sketch
Head scarves
Coming up with an idea for above the couch
Dreaming in color
Remembering to call old friends
Making peace with the waves
French braids and berets
Comfort food and remembering why I hate it
A new idea to jumpstart myself inthe right direction.
24 June 2008 @ 08:52 am
This morning is...
really loud music
sleeping in until the last possible moment
Vanilla Al'Mondo Protein drink by Odwalla (if you haven't tried this, you need to.)
getting to drive down to Seabright
feeling on top of work relations
having a slight unfiltered sake hangover and loving it
forgetting my cell phone at home
a bucket of paint sitting in my bathroom
maybe teal for my kitchen?
not minding Marvin sleeping on my pillow all night
getting laid last night
wearing a moonstone bracelet (because the moon is in my sign today)
remembering when I used to love that kind of stuff
researching pottery classes
looking forward to ally coming home
and going down to slo to visit jac
And enjoying the minutes for a change.
really loud music
sleeping in until the last possible moment
Vanilla Al'Mondo Protein drink by Odwalla (if you haven't tried this, you need to.)
getting to drive down to Seabright
feeling on top of work relations
having a slight unfiltered sake hangover and loving it
forgetting my cell phone at home
a bucket of paint sitting in my bathroom
maybe teal for my kitchen?
not minding Marvin sleeping on my pillow all night
getting laid last night
wearing a moonstone bracelet (because the moon is in my sign today)
remembering when I used to love that kind of stuff
researching pottery classes
looking forward to ally coming home
and going down to slo to visit jac
And enjoying the minutes for a change.
23 June 2008 @ 09:49 am
I woke up in a lighter than average mood.
Yesterday I went to Target and spent $60.00 on rugs and a shower curtain for the bathroom. I'm going to cut the shower curtain and use the smaller portion to make a curtain for the window, and a curtain for the litter boxes. We're also going to move the towel racks to a more appropriate place. Tonight Sean and I are going to OSH to look at paint colors. The shower curtain I bought is great, it's blues and tans, and the rugs are a nice taupe color that I think will look fantastic with the deep brown tile on the floor. I just need to get towels now, and paint!
Sean also relinquished control over the TV room. So we're going to make it into the bedroom. And put the TV and futon up in the loft. Which makes me so happy! I'm going to put my desk/creative space in the bedroom, so I have more room to spread out and work. I thought I'd put my desk under the window with the view. And Sean can use the loft as his space. And that way he can put up his flag, and we can take the coffee table out of storage! That's good because we both love that coffee table.
Anyway, those things make me happy. I'm glad I'll have a better space for myself. Eventually we'll get some taller bookcases and move the fishtank to the opposite wall, and put a tall bookcase back between the chairs. It will come together and I'll feel less suffocated. And less like there's so much work to do.
:)
Pretty day.
13 June 2008 @ 06:35 pm
There are some emotions I'm ashamed of running rampant within me.
So instead, things I am thankful for:
... Owning a copy of It's a Wonderful Life and White Christmas. What better way to pick yourself up off the bathroom floor? Both of these movies are so inspiring and beautiful, and it's impossible to be depressed when they are on in the background. Even though they're Christmas movies.
... Having the most fantastic landlords. How many landlords do you know that allow 5 cats, 2 dogs, 2 turtles, and 3 fish tanks in a 700 square foot apartment? Not to mention two young and maybe slightly unstable tenants. They're just lovely, not to mention really awesome people.
... Anything that smells like Lavender or Jasmine. Two of the most fabulous scents in the world. I'm so lucky to have both plants in my garden, and body butter and soap and tea, all that smell like flowers. Which consequently make me smell like flowers, and I like that.
... Alanis Morrisette. I sometimes feel silly having such a school girl crush on this woman, but I truly think she is amazing. Not only is she brave, for writing and singing her emotions and fears the way she does, but she's beautiful. She's inspiring, she's honest, she laughs at herself, she makes me want to live better. She's an example of what it takes. I hope one day I can say all of those things about myself.
... Big plush towels. There is nothing better than a hot shower and then big (preferrably purple or green) plush soft warm emcompassing cotton towels.
... Good neighbors. Two of them are my landlords, and I love them. I hope one day I'm as accomplished but as earthed as these two people. The other neighbor is someone whom under different circumstances I would be inclined to be friends with. And that is pretty cool in itself.
... Working from home. It's nice to know that if I take time off with one job, the next job will make up for it. It's also nice to work in a towel and a clay mask, with Alanis (there she is again!) blaring in the background, and the kitties laying on the mouse or chasing the cursor.
... For Kyle, who looks at the sun's red glow and says "It looks like the sky is bleeding!"
... For never having to worry about being lonely. Mops, Marvin, Stuey... always constant.
08 June 2008 @ 08:50 pm
I like to pray.
It's not as though I pray to God, though. It's more like praying to everything that is, that has been, that will be.
Pray to succulent cherries that have tiny and beautiful water droplets clinging to them.
Pray to the people that make my favorite all natural, all vegan, all organic lavender soap.
Pray to the man that bought me a bracelet on a whim.
Pray to the lovely kitties that occupy my space.
Pray to inspiration.
Pray to paint encrusted fingernails.
Pray to green, green everywhere.
Pray to the adoring people that never look uncomfortable or at a loss.
Pray to the sky and earth and ocean and mountains.
To pretty vases from pretty people
to good books
and the authors that write them
to dreaming of things you love
to the wind
when it comes sweeping through tree branches
to touches that may not be desperate
but are at least true
to things magnified
and things dulled
to drying lavender in the window
to planting marigolds
to whomever thought that one up
I love to pray. Prayers are sort of like affirmations of life. You don't need to pray for things to have, own, experience. Just for the things you know are, will be, have been. I thank everything and everyone for everything we've ever done... for embracing a new way of living and of viewing life. For self-sustainment.
For the blessing of higher gas prices, for the blessing of places that offer food to those in need, for those of nomadic territory, for those with a strong sense of home.
I love the world for what it does inside of me when I pray.
It's not as though I pray to God, though. It's more like praying to everything that is, that has been, that will be.
Pray to succulent cherries that have tiny and beautiful water droplets clinging to them.
Pray to the people that make my favorite all natural, all vegan, all organic lavender soap.
Pray to the man that bought me a bracelet on a whim.
Pray to the lovely kitties that occupy my space.
Pray to inspiration.
Pray to paint encrusted fingernails.
Pray to green, green everywhere.
Pray to the adoring people that never look uncomfortable or at a loss.
Pray to the sky and earth and ocean and mountains.
To pretty vases from pretty people
to good books
and the authors that write them
to dreaming of things you love
to the wind
when it comes sweeping through tree branches
to touches that may not be desperate
but are at least true
to things magnified
and things dulled
to drying lavender in the window
to planting marigolds
to whomever thought that one up
I love to pray. Prayers are sort of like affirmations of life. You don't need to pray for things to have, own, experience. Just for the things you know are, will be, have been. I thank everything and everyone for everything we've ever done... for embracing a new way of living and of viewing life. For self-sustainment.
For the blessing of higher gas prices, for the blessing of places that offer food to those in need, for those of nomadic territory, for those with a strong sense of home.
I love the world for what it does inside of me when I pray.
03 June 2008 @ 06:48 pm
365: June 2
Originally uploaded by wakingmagenta.
See me and my pretty little organic life.
I was still sick on this day, but I managed to drag myself out to the deck to plant some flowers and veggies.
This is a fantastic way to live.
01 June 2008 @ 08:42 pm
CIMG3649 copy
Originally uploaded by wakingmagenta.
I feel like the photos and blogs I keep aren't the best indication of my life.
Granted, the whole world of the internet does not need to know exactly what my life is, and I'm okay with what the world thinks of me. I am but one, and the ones who know me best know my life.
But, I still feel like an accurate representation should be made. Maybe for my own sake and peace of mind.
So here we go. Today, I picked flowers from my garden and put them in a simple mason jar, with some Chinese marbles that have been sitting around since Stuey won the battle with the betta. They're very pretty, and now my living room has the faint smell of lavender and the outdoors.
I've been feeling a bit under the weather all weekend, with a lingering cold. Interestingly enough, the idea of taking herbs or naturopathic remedies completely turned me off this time around. Normally, I'm a regular Eastern medicine advocate, but I wanted to do things the 'old fashioned' way this weekend. Lots of movies, soups, sleeping, DayQuil, and reading a detective novel.
How do they compare? Well, my energy level sucked and I was sick the entire load of minutes from the moment my throat started hurting until now, when my throat still hurts and my head is stuffed. I think with the Eastern meds way, I'm still just as sick, but my energy level keeps up with me, and I get over the illness quicker.
Why did I decide for the comforting way? My energy lately has been one of creating a home, creating a nest I can live in peacefully. I love our new place, but I'm finding the challenges of having a super small space to be trying. Sean and I are on the same schedules now, and we're on top of each other all the time. There's no escaping. And while I love the guy, I need escape, or I go nuts. The other challenge is finding a place for all of our crap. I have no problem downsizing and packing things into storage, or tossing things, but it seems even our basic living needs are too much for this space.
Today I went to spend some time with my mom, since I haven't been over there since we moved to Felton. It was very nice to see her, and I came home with some beautiful snapdragons and some basil for my porch. The dogs were pretty well behaved, and now they're both chewing on their bones at my feet.
And there you have it. Sometimes it's more interesting, other times not. But there it is.
More tomorrow.
So there you have today.
19 May 2008 @ 07:49 am
That one day I would be posting to my blog at 7:45 in the morning?
Who would have thought that a random visit from a friend would give me the boost I need to get my ass in gear and finally lose that 20 pounds?
That when looking in the mirror this morning I almost recognized myself?
18 May 2008 @ 10:37 am
What a pretty little day today.
I woke up, and worked for just a couple of hours... I though my creativity was crashing and failing and burning and hiding, but then something struck me.
I think it was the smell of jasmine wafting through an open window.
Or maybe it was the finally clean floor in Sean's TV room.
Or maybe the green juice slushee for lunch.
The lack of anyone to answer to today.
Kyle calling to say hello, and let's take a drive and a hike and a picnic with some music and good company.
The abundance of kitty purrs in my little abode.
A nagging knowledge of a pretty fantastic future.
Either way, 4 hours and a finished gift later, creativity came back.
Lovely.
I woke up, and worked for just a couple of hours... I though my creativity was crashing and failing and burning and hiding, but then something struck me.
I think it was the smell of jasmine wafting through an open window.
Or maybe it was the finally clean floor in Sean's TV room.
Or maybe the green juice slushee for lunch.
The lack of anyone to answer to today.
Kyle calling to say hello, and let's take a drive and a hike and a picnic with some music and good company.
The abundance of kitty purrs in my little abode.
A nagging knowledge of a pretty fantastic future.
Either way, 4 hours and a finished gift later, creativity came back.
Lovely.
11 May 2008 @ 10:02 am
I have a lovely minute to myself to collect my thoughts and actions into one beautiful little space.
This home is terrific. When I look out my windows all I see is green. I feel creative and free to be bold. I have an impenetrable secret hideaway where jasmine tea flows abundantly and comfort is only an armchair and a book away.
`
This home is terrific. When I look out my windows all I see is green. I feel creative and free to be bold. I have an impenetrable secret hideaway where jasmine tea flows abundantly and comfort is only an armchair and a book away.
`
08 May 2008 @ 09:23 pm
Heya.
Ran into an old roommate tonight. We ended up having dinner and it was pretty good. We caught up with the year that has passed since we parted ways... she seems like she's in a better place.
It was funny, because when I came home from work today, I went up into my loft and looked at my new life and for a split second longed for the days of deep dissatisfaction and moping and more slumber than I knew what to do with.
It's interesting how my mind sometimes craves things like that, even when life is sweet.
29 April 2008 @ 09:20 am
Of the next life.
Circular windows letting in circular light
Closing the windows at dusk to keep the mosquitos out and the pets in
Organic produce from my very own garden
Pulling weeds
Creative jobs and creative projects
Loving the space I'm in
Goal for the day:
Clean off the bulletin board in the spare room and put the things worth keeping in an inspiration notebook.
I like to get lost in the lives of other creative people, but I find that the balance is precarious. When reading and looking at other people's work, there's always this light and dark aspect that tips the balance too much to either end for me. Some people are light, or at least their work is. And then others are a little on the dark and devious side for me. I find that the balance within myself is affected by the viewing of other people's work. I.e., a light life provokes thoughts of inadequacy. "Why can't I portray my life in these soft yet vibrant colors?" Darker work tends to make me uninspired (which I suppose tells me something about the type of person I am...).
I want to work on my posture.
Circular windows letting in circular light
Closing the windows at dusk to keep the mosquitos out and the pets in
Organic produce from my very own garden
Pulling weeds
Creative jobs and creative projects
Loving the space I'm in
Goal for the day:
Clean off the bulletin board in the spare room and put the things worth keeping in an inspiration notebook.
I like to get lost in the lives of other creative people, but I find that the balance is precarious. When reading and looking at other people's work, there's always this light and dark aspect that tips the balance too much to either end for me. Some people are light, or at least their work is. And then others are a little on the dark and devious side for me. I find that the balance within myself is affected by the viewing of other people's work. I.e., a light life provokes thoughts of inadequacy. "Why can't I portray my life in these soft yet vibrant colors?" Darker work tends to make me uninspired (which I suppose tells me something about the type of person I am...).
I want to work on my posture.
23 April 2008 @ 09:06 am
May have turned into Juicy Wednesday this week.
Breakfast:
1 head of romaine lettuce
2 sprig thingies of kale
3 tangerines
4 strawberries
1 sprig of mint
ALL thrown in the juicer and juiced! It was divine.
22 April 2008 @ 09:21 am
I'm going to do Raw Food Wednesdays, and Juicy Tuesdays.
"I'm going to buy you a goldfish on my last day here, and I'm going to be upset if you don't talk to it and call it Brie." -me
"Just make sure it's vegan." --Ray
"I'm going to buy you a goldfish on my last day here, and I'm going to be upset if you don't talk to it and call it Brie." -me
"Just make sure it's vegan." --Ray
16 April 2008 @ 08:49 am
My co-worker has the most fantastic infectious laugh. I can't help but laugh along with him.
Thinking big:
I want to travel to every continent
I want to live in an ashram
Do a yoga retreat
Own a fantastic and fast car
Make a million dollars in one year
Secure a high paying, high energy, exciting job
Start my own business
Work from home
Take a stunt driving course
Teach Mops how to put away his toys
Thinking big:
I want to travel to every continent
I want to live in an ashram
Do a yoga retreat
Own a fantastic and fast car
Make a million dollars in one year
Secure a high paying, high energy, exciting job
Start my own business
Work from home
Take a stunt driving course
Teach Mops how to put away his toys
15 April 2008 @ 01:21 pm
...offices with a window
...plants on my desk
...splashing in the ocean with Mops
...sand in my shoes
...good books lent by fabulous people
...vegan spring rolls for lunch
...changing locations
...travel
...Adobe InDesign
...raw food journals sent straight to my inbox
...Jamba Juice
...plants on my desk
...splashing in the ocean with Mops
...sand in my shoes
...good books lent by fabulous people
...vegan spring rolls for lunch
...changing locations
...travel
...Adobe InDesign
...raw food journals sent straight to my inbox
...Jamba Juice
04 April 2008 @ 04:13 pm
Do you define yourself by how you sit in a cube all day?
Or an office with a view?
"I'm in marketing. I sit at a desk and create cool corporate art to sell people pre-packaged health. My desk if full of tea bags, my office has plants, and I'm characteristically an organized mess. You know the type, creative but grounded with a flair for cooking up a damn good vegan meal. My CD player has the new Interpol CD in it, and my co-worker and I shoot rubber bands at each other to break the silence sometimes. There are pictures of my honey and I on my wall, a picture of my cats and my dog, and a puppy calendar marked with all the cool places I get to travel this year. Yeah, it's not so bad, the money is okay, and I like the people I spend 40 hours a week with. And I have Mondays off. Can't complain."
Is that me? I mean, yes, it's my life, but is it my spirit/soul/aura/journey/being/personali
If your worth is measured by the way you treat other sentient beings, I may not be the best person to befriend. I can be flaky and sometimes dishonest, and a big general pain in the ass to keep happy. On the other hand, I pick up lost animals and return them to their tearful owners and warm beds, I always give a spare dollar to the homeless (and a biscuit to their dogs), I have no problem letting someone in front of me in line, even if their load is bigger than mine, I always hold the door (for anyone. Including kids, slow elderlies, and groups of 78 family members.), and I never cut people off when I'm driving. If it comes to cutting someone off and missing my exit, I'll take the long way.
If your worth is measured by what you do and what decisions you make, then I may be a pretty damn cool person. I work in marketing and sales, I have a kick ass apartment, with kick ass pets, and a fucking fabulous boyfriend. We go for hikes and road trips on our days off. I paint and write in a journal every day, I have 15 minutes of every day for quiet Brie time, to do yoga, meditate, sit in silence, pray, or be aware. I eat well and exercise, and I'm decent to the people around me, maybe even excessively friendly. I wake up early, drink good tea, listen to good music, and feed my soul. Recycle and compost my trash. I always consider both sides and never forget to weigh the consequences.
If your worth is determined by how you do the things you do, I may be okay. I try to do a good job in every task I undertake, keeping sight of my own goals and everyone elses feelings/wants/needs/goals as well. I do my work with a feeling of self accomplishment and with a bit of integrity. I admit, sometimes I get lazy and take the short way to my goal, but generally the goal is still reached.
If your worth is determined by what you own (and I sincerely hope it's not, because that just sucks), I may be a bit on the worthy side. But then again, maybe not. My car is damn cute, though not the most expensive or deluxe model on the market, it gets me from point A to B, with a rocking stereo and a few head turns on the way. Wouldn't your head turn if you saw cute little me in my cute little yellow beetle with cow print seat covers? My apartment is small, but cozy and in a freaking awesome location, and my landlords rock. My cats and my dog are the coolest animals you'll meet. I have over 500 DVD's and over 500 CD's, and lots of bubble bath.
If your worth is determined by your decision making, I'm on shaky ground. We won't go into much detail. Suffice to say, I suck with finances, I sometimes lose my temper, and I've been known to take off in a teary mess.
All in all, worth is just a silly way of determining how you should feel about yourself.
But I think the main thing is 'how do you feel about yourself?'
Or an office with a view?
"I'm in marketing. I sit at a desk and create cool corporate art to sell people pre-packaged health. My desk if full of tea bags, my office has plants, and I'm characteristically an organized mess. You know the type, creative but grounded with a flair for cooking up a damn good vegan meal. My CD player has the new Interpol CD in it, and my co-worker and I shoot rubber bands at each other to break the silence sometimes. There are pictures of my honey and I on my wall, a picture of my cats and my dog, and a puppy calendar marked with all the cool places I get to travel this year. Yeah, it's not so bad, the money is okay, and I like the people I spend 40 hours a week with. And I have Mondays off. Can't complain."
Is that me? I mean, yes, it's my life, but is it my spirit/soul/aura/journey/being/personali
If your worth is measured by the way you treat other sentient beings, I may not be the best person to befriend. I can be flaky and sometimes dishonest, and a big general pain in the ass to keep happy. On the other hand, I pick up lost animals and return them to their tearful owners and warm beds, I always give a spare dollar to the homeless (and a biscuit to their dogs), I have no problem letting someone in front of me in line, even if their load is bigger than mine, I always hold the door (for anyone. Including kids, slow elderlies, and groups of 78 family members.), and I never cut people off when I'm driving. If it comes to cutting someone off and missing my exit, I'll take the long way.
If your worth is measured by what you do and what decisions you make, then I may be a pretty damn cool person. I work in marketing and sales, I have a kick ass apartment, with kick ass pets, and a fucking fabulous boyfriend. We go for hikes and road trips on our days off. I paint and write in a journal every day, I have 15 minutes of every day for quiet Brie time, to do yoga, meditate, sit in silence, pray, or be aware. I eat well and exercise, and I'm decent to the people around me, maybe even excessively friendly. I wake up early, drink good tea, listen to good music, and feed my soul. Recycle and compost my trash. I always consider both sides and never forget to weigh the consequences.
If your worth is determined by how you do the things you do, I may be okay. I try to do a good job in every task I undertake, keeping sight of my own goals and everyone elses feelings/wants/needs/goals as well. I do my work with a feeling of self accomplishment and with a bit of integrity. I admit, sometimes I get lazy and take the short way to my goal, but generally the goal is still reached.
If your worth is determined by what you own (and I sincerely hope it's not, because that just sucks), I may be a bit on the worthy side. But then again, maybe not. My car is damn cute, though not the most expensive or deluxe model on the market, it gets me from point A to B, with a rocking stereo and a few head turns on the way. Wouldn't your head turn if you saw cute little me in my cute little yellow beetle with cow print seat covers? My apartment is small, but cozy and in a freaking awesome location, and my landlords rock. My cats and my dog are the coolest animals you'll meet. I have over 500 DVD's and over 500 CD's, and lots of bubble bath.
If your worth is determined by your decision making, I'm on shaky ground. We won't go into much detail. Suffice to say, I suck with finances, I sometimes lose my temper, and I've been known to take off in a teary mess.
All in all, worth is just a silly way of determining how you should feel about yourself.
But I think the main thing is 'how do you feel about yourself?'